Tahmina Khaidarova’s journey from a young girl from rural Tajikistan to a national leader in HIV advocacy
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In 2010, Tahmina Khaidarova from Dushanbe was diagnosed with HIV, a moment that significantly altered the course of her life. Beyond the personal challenges, she also had to navigate social stigma in her community.
With the support of her mother and sisters, she found ways to move forward. Today, at 39, Tahmina leads the Tajikistan Network of Women Living with HIV (TNW Plus). She works to empower women through education, advocacy, and leadership programs, focusing on reducing discrimination and misinformation.
Over the years, she has also built a new life for herself, one that includes a loving husband and healthy children.
Early support and later society’s restrictions
Khaidarova grew up in a rural Tajik family, where tradition shaped girls' futures. While her father encouraged her education in her early years, further schooling was ultimately not an option.
“When I finished middle school, I was the only daughter in the family allowed to continue to grade 11,” she recalls. Her older sisters were not permitted to finish high school, but Khaidarova did well academically and wanted to become a lawyer.
However, her education ended after high school.
“When I finished high school and wanted to pursue a degree in law at the university, unfortunately, my father did not allow it,” she says. “He only said that I should get married, and if my future husband agreed, he would cover all the expenses for my education, but I could only pursue higher education after marriage.”
At 18, her family arranged her marriage to her cousin.
From a routine checkup to a life-altering truth
Khaidarova’s first child became seriously ill before turning two.
“We sought treatment, but it was unclear what was causing her illness,” she remembers. Despite multiple efforts, her daughter passed away, with leukemia listed as the final diagnosis.
After her loss, she focused on planning for another child. “I wanted to be a mother again,” she says.
Before joining her husband abroad, she visited a doctor for routine tests.
“I told my gynecologist that my life had become complicated - I had lost my child, my husband was away, and I wanted to prepare for motherhood again. She wrote down two tests for me.”
The test results were unexpected. “When the results came back, it was confirmed that I was healthy with regard to hepatitis B and C, but HIV was present in my blood.”
In school, she had been taught that HIV was uncommon in Tajikistan and mostly affected specific risk groups. “I never thought it was something that could affect people like me.”
When her husband returned, she told him about her diagnosis, expecting support. Instead, he reacted with anger.
“He responded with reproach, insults, and harsh words - because I had taken the test without asking him.” Two months later, he returned from abroad in poor health. Within ten days, he passed away.
As her family learned about their HIV status, she noticed a change in how people treated her.
“People whispered. Some distanced themselves, afraid they could catch it just by being near me. I was grieving my husband, my child, and at the same time, I felt isolated.”
“Everyone hoped that after losing my child and my husband, this situation would somehow pass. But for my family, this was difficult news to accept.”
Rebuilding life on her own terms
After her husband's passing, Tahmina Khaidarova was introduced to an HIV support organization, which later offered her a job. However, her in-laws and extended family were against her working or continuing her education.
Rebuilding through knowledge and action: In her office in Dushanbe, Tahmina Khaidarova channels her strength into work and education, proving that an HIV diagnosis does not define one’s future. Photo: UN Women/Danijel Rakić.
“They did not want me to work or study. But I went to my in-laws, my uncles, and told them that clothing and food were not important,” she recalls. “What mattered to me was gaining more knowledge, helping myself first, and preparing for the future.”
What mattered to me was gaining more knowledge, helping myself first, and preparing for the future.”
– Tahmina Khaidarova
She decided to move forward despite opposition.
“I saw people living with this virus and having healthy children,” she says. “To obtain information, to enter university, to achieve other goals - there are no barriers except the ones we create for ourselves. Only desire, effort, and belief are necessary.”
“To obtain information, to enter university, to achieve other goals - there are no barriers except the ones we create for ourselves.” – Tahmina Khaidarova
With support from her mother, sisters, doctors, and colleagues, she found a way to rebuild her life.
In 2011, she enrolled at Pedagogical University, studying Pre-School Education and Psychology while continuing her work in HIV advocacy. Balancing full-time work and studies wasn’t easy, but in 2016, she graduated with a diploma.
Finding balance in family and advocacy
Today, Tahmina is remarried and has healthy children.
“I am the mother of two healthy children, and my husband is also healthy. I live in a discordant family,” she says, referring to families where one partner has HIV and the other does not.
Her personal life is now a source of stability, reinforcing her belief that HIV does not prevent a fulfilling life.
Amid the greenery of the city park, Tahmina Khaidarova embraces moments of peace, balancing her dedication to advocacy with the joys of family and everyday life. Photo: UN Women/Danijel Rakić.
“Young women who have just been diagnosed with HIV should not become discouraged,” she says. “They still have the opportunity to build a healthy family, have children, and pursue a career.”
For Tahmina Khaidarova, this is the message she wants other women to hear - that an HIV diagnosis is not the end of their aspirations.
Building a support system she never had
As she worked in the field, Tahmina noticed a gap in services. While some organizations supported people living with HIV, there were none specifically dedicated to the needs of women and girls.
“In 2011, we, women living with HIV/AIDS, saw that there were no organizations supporting women and girls like us. Together with active women, we decided to create one,” she says.
More than 40 women came together to build a support network, and in 2013, Khaidarova was elected as its leader.
Amid the greenery of the city park, Tahmina Khaidarova embraces moments of peace, balancing her dedication to advocacy with the joys of family and everyday life. Photo: UN Women/Danijel Rakić.
Creating the support she once needed: Tahmina finds joy in simple moments, proving that life after an HIV diagnosis can be full of strength, laughter, and purpose. Photo: UN Women/Danijel Rakić.
Since then, she has focused on community education, reducing stigma, and advocating for women living with HIV.
Mentoring women to take back their power
The women Khaidarova has mentored now run their own businesses, contribute to their communities and challenge stereotypes about living with HIV.
“When I see the women I’ve mentored building their own futures, I feel a sense of pride,” she says.
But her mentorship goes beyond HIV support. For many women, a positive diagnosis is not just a medical condition - it affects their confidence, financial stability, and sense of independence. Tahmina Khaidarova works to ensure they don’t just survive but thrive.
“I don’t just talk to women about HIV. We talk about self-confidence, how to assert their rights, and how to become financially independent,” she explains.
“I don’t just talk to women about HIV. We talk about self-confidence, how to assert their rights, and how to become financially independent.” – Tahmina Khaidarova
Through training programs, peer support networks, and one-on-one guidance, she helps women develop skills that allow them to work, support their families, and regain control over their lives.
“Many women I work with were once completely dependent on their families or husbands, and after their diagnosis, they felt even more powerless. But when they learn that they can earn money, make decisions, and have control over their own lives, everything changes.”
Her journey reflects the “Full and Equal Decision-Making Power” area of the Beijing+30 Action Agenda, a voluntary, action-oriented platform to accelerate the implementation of the Beijing Declaration and Platform for Action and the 2030 Agenda. By advocating for women’s right to education, financial independence, and leadership, she ensures they are not left vulnerable to stigma or dependence on others.
Her work has also had an impact on how HIV is understood in Tajikistan.
“We need to work together to reduce stigma. Awareness and education make a difference, and the more people understand, the less discrimination there will be.”
We need to work together to reduce stigma. Awareness and education make a difference, and the more people understand, the less discrimination there will be.”
– Tahmina Khaidarova
From a young girl in rural Tajikistan, unable to pursue higher education, to a national leader in HIV advocacy, Tahmina’s journey highlights the importance of perseverance, education, and self-empowerment.
This story is a part of the Beijing+30 regional communications campaign ‘Unstoppable’, aimed at marking the 30th commemoration of the Beijing Declaration and Platform for Action. The views expressed in this story are those of the protagonist and the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of UN Women, the United Nations, or any of its affiliated organizations.